Stop Projecting, Start Reflecting

Have you ever noticed that sometimes observation changes everything? You would think "Is that`s why we meditate?", "Is that`s why we keep stillness and become silent many times?" The reality many times is abstract construct - something we`ve created in our heads, tried to live and breath through, tried to validate with some "signs from God". Projection is easy, subtle, it rarely announces itself, we just let it be. It feels justified and convincing - everything in our head seems quite as it should be, all our thoughts and desires, feelings, emotions. And our closest ones also agree with our projection, with our certainty of it - our intentions, flaws, mistakes seem validated and natural because of "who we are", "what we do", "what childhood traumas we have", and so on. 

But most of the time, projection isn’t perception. It’s unfinished business looking for a surface, to immerse, to validate and to procreate, over and over again. People seem to forget or deny that there is another way, a way  which does not include ignoring the world and become passive, but exactly the opposite - becoming active in your choices, start reflecting on your life and life-choices. Reflection asks for something braver.

And whenever emotions rise sharply - anger, defensiveness, disappointment - it’s worth asking: What is this touching in me? Not as self-judgment, but as curiosity. Because reflection is not punishment. It’s intimacy with oneself, it`s a pause - a pause, long enough to notice what is being stirred inside before assigning it a cause outside. We have to find the difference between reacting and responding and this happens through practice - every single time we have a choice between projecting and reflecting, we must distinguish the difference between blame and responsibility, between noise and clarity.

A moment of silence, a conscious breath, a pause before speaking is all it takes for the stillness to help. We need that moment of stillness, that space of awareness which gradually will return to our bodies, with every step, with every practice. Noticing the nervous system downshifts once we realize that most of our external problems often reveals themselves as an internal pattern.

Yoga understands this well. Each posture, each transition, mirrors daily life. When balance is lost, the instinct is to fight or force. Reflection invites another approach: adjust, soften, modify. Release tension without collapsing. Stay present without overcorrecting. Strength and serenity coexist here. Reflection needs time, to adapt, to synchronize with our internal world, it thrives on slow motions. Projection on the other hand explodes and flourish on speed. Our emotions and words are as fast as the speed of light, we react to a certain happening, or to a certain statement somebody said to us, the whole world encourages immediacy - opinions formed quickly, reactions shared instantly. And we think that this is the reality, but it`s not. It is simply not. 

Our inner wisdom asks us for patience, for solitude, for slower moves. Nature offers a natural window of reflection - when you feel like the false statements start wondering in your mind, take a deep breath and step outside, step into the forest, on the seashore, in the mountains, in your backyard garden and listen - listen to the wind, to the sun, to the birds. Do not fix anything, just observe and ground your mind.

When projection fades, accountability sharpens. Not in a heavy way, but in a liberating one. You begin to notice where emotional energy is invested unnecessarily. Which battles are chosen out of habit rather than intention. Which reactions are inherited rather than authentic.

Reflection shifts the question from Who is wrong? to What is mine to work with?

This doesn’t erase boundaries. It refines them. It makes sensitivity a strength rather than a liability. It helps recognize microaggressions without becoming consumed by them. It allows discernment without bitterness.

There’s humility in reflection. A quiet acceptance that growth is ongoing, imperfect, cyclical. That confusion often precedes insight. That clarity arrives not through control, but through presence, a quit and peaceful one. And all of a sudden, you will realize that creativity benefits from this shift too. When energy isn’t wasted on projection, it becomes available for exploration. Expression feels cleaner. More honest. Less reactive. Play returns - not as distraction, but as genuine inquiry. It returns as a childlike openness to not knowing yet, but still - just play and have a great day, without expectations, or a plan.

Once you start deep diving into your own reflections, you will start strengthening your relationships - not only with everyone around you, but especially with oneself. Trust grows when reactions are examined instead of defended. Compassion deepens when judgment dissolves. Communication becomes clearer, because it’s no longer fueled by assumption.

There’s a grounded power in this way of being. You stop outsourcing authority over your inner world. You stop letting external circumstances dictate your state. You become the eye of the hurricane - aware of movement, yet centered. You may think at the beginning that this makes life quieter on the outside. But on the contrary - it makes life quieter on the inside and from that inside quiet, insight emerges, wisdom refines, patterns reveal themselves. You begin to see where beliefs can be altered, where rigidity can soften, where growth is waiting. And this is the path for your outer world to be changed.

So today, I invite you to stop projecting - you don`t have to be always right, you just have to be real to yourself. Remember that reflection doesn’t promise comfort, but it offers clarity. And clarity, over time, creates freedom. Not freedom from life - but freedom within it.

Be kind and thank yourself later for being a better person! 

With love,

S.